This is right on.
“A Conversation with My Abba Father” Wendy Alec, London, UK
Beautiful hearts, when I saw in one of the responses to a recent post of mine, that one of our treasured princess warriors had been running away from the Lord, I knew I had to post this article below, as I had such a prompting to post it from “the Father”.
Oh Father, let it comfort hearts just as You comforted my heart when I was running away from You because I didn’t understand Your ways in the long winter season. Promotion is in sight! It’s right at your door beloved one.
Love,
Wendy
Hiding from the Father
I had been hiding from the Father. For the past three and a half years, I had been flinging myself totally on His mercy and His fellowship. After such intense trauma, it was as though I was stuck in a “no man’s land”. Where miracles used to come thick and furiously, it was as though I was trapped in an eternal winter. I had done everything possible to heal, receiving so much prayer, repenting for generational lines, and getting deliverance. My nature is to get help when needed – to run towards healing and ministry and I had done that.
“Oh, we make Him so proud, beloved. Even in our childish humanity and besetting sins that sometimes so easily entangle us.”
Part of my calling, in the office of the prophet, is that God uses me as “Exhibit A”. This often means that what I experience is where many of the Body of Christ are at that exact time. I knew firsthand that there were so very many of God’s champions – prophetic intercessors, prophets, and seers – who had been experiencing intense loss and trauma. They were in the valley of the shadow…the wilderness.
I had stood for so long, with seemingly little hope or breakthrough, that I finally found myself literally running away from the Father. Deep, deep inside I knew that it was because I had cried so many tears and that I was hurting badly, really badly. I didn’t understand why my beloved, adored Father God – my beloved ABBA, who I had such a history with – hadn’t come to my rescue.
So I did what I did when I was a teenager…I ran away. I deliberately avoided Him. When I wasn’t working toward the huge deadline from my publishers on book five of Chronicles, I would escape into sleep and thankful oblivion, or watching hours of television, which I hadn’t done for years. So I knew that the answers weren’t to be just for me, but for so many who were going through this strange, intensive time of a seeming unending wilderness.
Forgiving God?
I would wake up in the morning and hear Him say, “Beloved Child…” then I would duck my head under the blankets and run again. But tonight was a different night. I realized that I had to forgive God.
I had to forgive my beloved Father because the absolute truth was that I had become so intensely hurt. I felt that He had allowed me to go through so much devastating loss, that I had actually become offended at my heavenly Father. This was absolutely shocking to me because no matter WHAT I had ever been through in my life previously, I had always known Him as my adored protector, my absolute rock; my all in all. This seeming “heavens as brass” threw me into a situation that seemed far above my own earthly comprehension and into a grid that I had never, ever experienced before. (Photo via Unsplash)
I was hurting so desperately and would cry out to Him like a bewildered five year old, over and over again. “I don’t understand! I don’t understand! Daddy, I’ve served You as faithfully as I can with my whole heart all these years. I brought before You all my humanity and besetting weaknesses, but if You don’t come through for me, literally, I’ve been through so much, that for the first time in my entire life, I think I’m done. Kaput. Game over. I don’t understand. I don’t understand.” I wanted to run away!
If anyone would ever have told me that there would be a time and a place where I would run from my Abba, I would never have believed them. But here I was, completely out of my “Daddy grid,” running furiously. Deep down, I was totally bewildered, and subconsciously deeply hurt and dare I say it…angry that I had been pushed to beyond my earthly limit, and that the heavens were seeming as brass.
The Lovely Friend
Kim Clement had once asked God the question, “Who is Wendy?” He had been so amazed by the answer that he checked and rechecked with the Father. God gave him the same answer each time: “The lovely friend.” Well, for sure I wasn’t being “the lovely friend” to the Father. “The lovely friend” was running as fast as she could…away.
But I also knew that the Father had some profound truths that He wanted to share. First, I had to say sorry and ask His forgiveness. Secondly, stop running. “Daddy, I’m SO sorry for being so hurt and offended at You. Please forgive me. I miss You. I love You, ABBA. Please help me. Have mercy on me.”
And So, the Father Spoke…
“Child, beloved child. I have allowed you to go through the fiery furnace that many, many of My beloved sons and daughters have been experiencing in this hour. I have allowed this because, as My scribe, they will read your words and know deep within their hearts that they are not alone in this season of transition in the Body of Christ.
“Beloved child, you and many others have been tested to almost the very limit of your endurance in this season. For it is the season of promotion. But the natural always follows after the spiritual.”
“You’re saying this is an exam, Daddy?” Yes, I could sense the Father’s deep compassion and His smile.
“Yes beloved, weary child. It is the devil’s TEST, but I am the adjudicator.”
“I didn’t understand why my beloved, adored Father God – my beloved ABBA, who I had such a history with – hadn’t come to my rescue.”
“Oh, but Daddy, this is the severest thing I’ve ever experienced. It’s taking every ounce of courage just to face the day.”
Then I sensed the Father say in His infinite compassion, “Do you remember when you sat your final exams in High School?” I nodded. “For those weeks and months, normal life stopped.” I thought back. It was so true.
“So, beloved child, in that time of having to pass the exams to get your promotion your normal activities ceased. Your parents put a curfew on you so that for that season you didn’t party or stay with friends and go out on the weekend. All the fun things you so enjoyed were put on hold. All because you had to pass the exam…the test.
“In this season of the Church, there is a worldwide test occurring. Many are not aware of it, but some of My children are. That is why for so many in this season, it has seemed that miracles are scarcer or take longer. That is why it has seemed like winter or the wilderness. But beloved child, partytime IS ahead.”
“Daddy, You’re saying that many of us are sitting an exam without having discerned that it is an exam?”
“Yes. You remember when you were sitting in the exam, you couldn’t ask your teachers any questions? You took the exam in complete silence. It was just you and the examination. You had to literally pull on every strand of knowledge that you had learned and absorbed in that past year to see exactly what had become a part of you and what you had truly retained.”
“But this, ABBA, this has been the hardest season for so many of us of our entire lives!”
“Yes, beloved child, remember My servant, Job? In the very end he received such recompense, such restitution. I was so very proud of him; his endurance, his steadfastness, and his perseverance. He was judged by several of those who were not walking in his footsteps and who had not been called like he was in that particular season. That is why I said, ‘Do not judge.’ There is only one Judge. Beloved child, I am the only one who knows and truly understands in My infinite wisdom and compassion, how intricately each child of Mine has been created and the true motivation of their hearts. I am an all-loving, omniscient, all-knowing Judge. I judge My own as a tender Father. (Photo via Unsplash)
“The reason you have felt so out of your normal grid with Me is because you are not used to Me being the Adjudicator.”
The Truth About Courage
My first instinct was to think, “Oh no. Well, I’ve SO blown it,” when the Father started to talk about courage.
“My children often think that true courage means to have no fear. But that is not courage, beloved. True courage is when, although having fear and having counted all the cost, you continue to walk on in endurance and faithfulness and perseverance through the fiery furnace and the burning desert wilderness, clinging onto Me by faith. That is the testing of your faith in Me which is more precious to Me than gold.
“When I looked down upon My servant Job, I knew that beyond his cries he had set his will to serve Me no matter the cost. My children who do the same are My heroes of yesteryear. These are My beloved champions of today – My precious jewels above price. My treasured, called-out ones; worthy of the victor’s crown, My purple hearts and the Father’s love…the Father’s love.”
You Are Home, Beloved
Oh, we make Him so proud, beloved. Even in our childish humanity and besetting sins that sometimes so easily entangle us. Today, our incredible Father, our omniscient, omnipotent Emperor would take you in His arms and hold you to His breast. As your tears fall upon His chest, it is He that softly, oh so tenderly, strokes your hair and kisses your head and whispers to your tired, oh so weary heart, “You are home, beloved. You are home. You are Mine and you are truly home.” (To Subscribe to the Elijah List subscribe here.)
Wendy Alec
Founder, God TV
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Wendy Alec (Wendy Mac