This is good, and I agree with you on it.
A few other thoughts that I have:
1) Behavior is not defining of a person. When we reject her sorry behavior, we are not rejecting her. She needs to understand this as much as possible.
2) Manipulation, explosive outbursts, etc. are not how we will communicate. If she loses it, we will agree with her and let her have some time to be with it before returning. I agree with you that she may need some education on what being disrespectful is. We cannot respond in anger. Actually, that is reacting – not responding. No reacting. If either of us is overwhelmed, let’s help each other and get a time out for the other. Go away for a day or so.
3) We will follow through on meeting with her when she wants or whatever frequency we need to so that she can be heard. And, I will bring my journal.
4) She will adhere to policy for friends, proms, etc.
5) We re-emphasize our love for her over and over. There is a spirit, of large authority, involved here. She is deceived. And, she has believed the lie. Her behavior is coming out of the lie. So, consequences only deal with the surface and not the root. I feel that the LORD is clear in that He will handle this. I do not believe that we need to take her anywhere for deliverance right now, maybe never. I just know that Jesus is going to deal with this. Our part is to speak truth into her and pour out love on her.
6) I am of the mindset that we keep declaring her freedom from this oppression and that she will go to Brazil. I expect her life to change with that trip and want to continue believing that God will intervene to see it come to pass.
7) Talk to her about CO when we know something. I believe that it will happen this week.
8) We have to realize that Jack and Jordan are two different people. There are some house rules that apply to both, and there are some that apply to one or the other. Jack cannot suffer because of Jordan’s rebellion.
9) We need to communicate this stuff to our folks for support.
10) You and I must come together in prayer.
Peace & Favor,
John J. Stein
(678) 333-6693 c
(404) 939-4329 d
www.elevate29.com
On Apr 17, 2011, at 9:32 AM, Laura Stein wrote:
Here is what I am thinking.
-When they get home from school they can watch tv, play guitar, get a snack for 30 minutes to unwind. Then they have to do homework and get all of the things that they need for the next day ready.
-Internet goes off at 11:00 during the week so plan ahead if you have a lot of homework.
-Jordan gives up her phone when she gets home from school.
-No Facebook for the next two weeks. She will get some of that privilege back if she behaves in a respectful way to everyone in the house. (We know what respectful is.)
-Clean rooms everyday for both. No food upstairs. When the trashcan is full, empty it.
Jordan has to clean her room thoroughly and if it is not acceptable when she is supposed to go somewhere, she will not go.
-Jordan can drive to school only if she is in her bed with the light out by 11:30. Otherwise we will have to take her(can’t go back and forth about riding the bus). If this happens more than once for the rest of the school year she will have to ride the bus from that point. Also she may not drive if she is upset, crying or disrespectful. The same goes for driving to church. All other driving is subject to us determining if it is necessary.
-Let’s explain to Jordan that saying she hates us etc. is disrespect.
-I don’t know what to say about Brazil. Is there a point that we pull the plug? I don’t really even want to talk about it because my hope is that if we do these things it will not ever become an issue.
-We will not accept Jordan’s “loop holes” any more. There will be things that we didn’t anticipate or cover but she still has to live by our rules.
-I am at a point that I don’t want to do anything for her other that feed, clothe(with what she has currently), and keep her safe.
-Jack will continue to take out the trash and mow the grass. Jordan will empty the kitchen sink and put away those dishes nightly as well as empty the dishwasher when needed. And she will be careful with the dishes. If she breaks them she will replace them. She wants to work in a restaurant, they won’t keep you if you cost them too much money.
-Both kids will continue to put their laundry away. Daily if needed or within 24 hours of it being done.
-Jordan is going to want to spend time with your parents but what I was getting at yesterday is that she has used that as a way to get out of doing what she is supposed to do. If the chores aren’t done she goes no where.
-We have to figure out something about a job for her. She must work if she is going to continue to drive.
-1:00AM bedtime on the weekends.
I probably haven’t covered everything here but this is a start. See you tonight.
Love,
Laura
Laura Stein
lauramstein@gmail.com